During one of your commitments to lose weight I’m sure you’ve been told it’s about making a lifestyle change, right? That phrase is just not empowering to me. Is it for you?

Lifestyle change for me brings visions of the stud whose been put out to pasture. Or, the old gunslinger who hangs up his guns. Not because he wants to, but because he feels pressure from his family to stop his dangerous ways of laying down bad guys and constantly testing his metal. Inside he still burns with the desire to enter another duel. He remains unfulfilled the rest of his life ever since his “lifestyle change.” You might say this is just word play, semantics. But that is your intellectual brain getting in the way. Don’t discount the power of the words you choose, the raw material of your thoughts.

To be successful, you’re going to need to recruit your emotions, understand what triggers them, and direct them in your fight to be fit. Part of directing your emotions is paying attention to the language and phrases you use, ( inside your head, or which roll of your tongue, and in the sources you choose to learn from), observing how they move you one way or another. Personally, I’ll leave the phrase “lifestyle change” for the weight loss clinics. What made all of the difference for me was embracing a quest to become an athlete, upgrading my identity. Eben Pagan describes it as moving to the “next evolution of you.” I didn’t want to become just any athlete. I wanted to become a fighter. This set in motion a whole slew of behavior changes because the pain of being fat was now just too much to take.

Being lean became more than a cosmetic fantasy but an essential tool in expressing who I believe I truly am. I couldn’t reconcile my new identity with the rolls of extra skin on my body which not only looked bad but stood in the way of me learning how to fight. Something had to give. The enjoyment of my nightly treat and any other calorie dense food was now dwarfed by the pain it gave me to eat them. I linked up nutrient dense foods with the pleasure of the vision of my future self. Broccoli was no longer something I thought I should eat once in a while; rather it was now a means to my goal. It was a vehicle to upgrading the quality of my life.

Technically, I have under gone a lifestyle change. But I didn’t choose to look at it like that. The excitement of a “lifestyle change” just doesn’t compete with the lure of a greasy combination pizza, boasting three types of meat. But upgrading to my next evolution? Dramatically upgrading the quality of my life? Living everyday with more bounce in my step? More courage to stand up to injustice and impose my mark on the world? Yeah. Those are cool. Those work for me. Ready to veg out as I write this.

What works for you?

What are the consequences of your fat that make this a dire circumstance for you to get a hold of right now? That make this something irreconcilable with your deepest held values of who you are? Or what new identity is it time to upgrade to in order to make your flubber seem as an encroaching enemy that must be vanquished? Get to know yourself. Not the stories that your analytical brain tells you about you, but the real you. Don’t worry. I know you’ll like what you uncover. That fat hanging off of you is not the real you nor are the false thoughts and stories in your head that led you to this.

Ready to DO THIS?

Take out a blank piece of paper and brain storm the following to get you some momentum. Don’t lose the power of NOW.

1. What is your body fat costing you in your life?

Think about the most important, most crucial areas. Not areas you “should” care about because society says you should but the areas that really matter to you at your core, at a gut level. Don’t judge yourself morally or rationally here. It is important to work with the guy we have now. Just take note of all the enticing things in your life you are missing out on by carrying a spare tire. Take note of everything it is getting in the way of, problems it is starting to cause and problems you know will inevitably grow worse without trimming up.

2. What benefits has it given you to this point?

Again: Emotionally. Sure the benefits you come up with here might not make a ton of sense. But know for sure that the only reason you’ve continued to act in a way that betrays your stated goal is that you’re fulfilling some perceived needs and gaining some benefits from your continued calorie surplus.

3. Compare the lists. How strong are each?

If both lists have good reasons and neither jumps out at you then either think harder or move on to another goal that you can actually be successful at; because this one ain’t happening buddy. However, if you’ve really thought hard and taken each to their extension, most likely you’ve found that the benefits in number one are enduring and truly valuable while the benefits in number two are serving your desire for instant gratification.

If that is the case then really mull those over and figure out if you still want to pay this price and tread the fatty path. DECIDE now that every bite counts. Every workout counts. You are in control and you’ll no longer settle for a calorie surplus. You can absolutely do this. You deserve it and your kid deserves it. Enjoy the transition into the real you and keep me posted. Part 2 of this post is an equally essential component as consciously selecting empowering language.

Stay tuned…